I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Toto

The original plan after Flagstaff was to stop in Kansas. However, while on the train and looking at our options we decided to skip it. Yep, miss out Kansas City altogether. It would have meant getting on and off the train very early, trying to get to a hotel quite a distance away and to be honest besides a giant shuttlecock, there's not much in Kansas. Indeed, most Americans had laughed when we told them we were going to Kansas City. Apparantly we are far too cultured to go to such a place.


Here is the giant shuttlecock that we could have seen. It's so... beautiful. What did we do, how could we have missed this. I'm booking a ticket to Kansas City just so I can see it with my own eyes


Without stopping in Kansas City, it did mean a 31 hour train ride to Chicago. We had a brief stop in Alburquerque to replenish on snacks and stretch our legs. The only problem with this, was that we had no accomadation booked. And we didn't realise until we got to Chicago that there was a large music festival on, meaning the hostel was fully booked up. This wasn't helped when going to the the tourist information centre and asking about accomodation. "How many of you are there" we were asked was quickly followed by "7 of you!" with a frightened expression on her face. We managed to find a motel and split into two different rooms.

Our first morning saw us go on a walking tour from the hostel. We didn't go that far and our guide spent most of the time talking about railways. It was choo choo riffic


Here's the fountain which was apparantly featured on Married with Children. It is therefore known as the Bundy fountain


The rail system that runs through Chicago. It was actually used to film the train sequence in Spiderman 2 with New York painted into the background. You can use all this film and television knowledge I'm giving you to impress family and friends


The view from our giant hostel room. Chicago was quite surprising with it's wonderful architecture. Although Andy saw more than he bargained for in the actual room itself


Our room was so big, Gav needed a map to navigate his way around


Ian and Liz go and pray to the giant face on the wall


While Gav stands in awe of the giant silver bean


Either our refelctions in the giant silver bean or evil versions of ourselves from a mirror universe


Keenie and evil Keenie, which one were we travelling around with though? If we had the good Keenie then I fear for the mirror universe


After a mind bending music visual experience in the planatarium, we were greeted with a great view of Chicago at night


I stole this picture from Gav as I didn't have my camera with me that night. You can find a link to all his pictures at the side of the blog. We went out somewhere, there was a bar and some things and some other things, stuff happened and there was a bowling arcade machine


Now, what would a city be without a tower to go up. But this time we had the choice of two. Either the Sears Tower, which used to be the tallest in the world or the John Hancock Tower. With the promise of an outdoor balcony and that we'd also be able to get pictures of the Sears Tower we went with Mr JH


The outdoor balcony was a bit of a let down but there in the background you can see the Sears tower. It made it all worth it


That looks dangerous. There was no stunt men involved


Gav pondering his future career options. He keeps appearing in my Chicago pictures for some reason


This may look like the sea but is actually Lake Michigan. It's quite big... and is full of water, with land around the outside


Another stop was the mini fairground. We went on the ferris wheel, the swings (Ian was too scared to go, crying like a baby he was) and finally a game of crazy golf. This was completed in heavy rainfall with myself pulling off another stunning victory to follow my success at Playland


Oooh, that's a bit of an arty shot. But what does it represent?

We were getting through so many cities in such a short space of time that you had to take pictures to remind yourself of where you were

A bit of excitement occured when the hostel had to be evacuated due to a fire alarm. Rumours that Keenie had tried to torch the place down proved to be unfounded

The hostel had free table tennis, we let Simon win all his matches. He's from the North, he doesn't have too much to celebrate

That was Chicago, the next stop would be Washington DC. Here we would have tea with Mr Bush and discuss the pros and cons of American foreign policy, the works and life of William Shakespeare and who was his favourite Tellytubby. It was Tinky Winky if you were wondering.

Would you like Irish Chips with those?

Our next stop was Flagstaff, a small town which would act as our base, so we could visit the Grand Canyon. Due to the fact that the trains only ran once a day we arrived at 5am. We soon discovered there wasn't much to Flagstaff, nothing more than a few shops and a few bars. But it served it's purpose.


We were there for two days. We went to the Grand Canyon on the second day, so on the first we decided to get a taxi and go to a ski lift. It would have given us a great view of Flagstaff and it's surroundings. If it was open that is


Ian's expression sums up the overall mood as we make a quicker than anticipated return to the hostel


Walking down the streets of Flagstaff. 5 minutes would probably take you around the whole town centre


The next day we set off with our tour guide to the Grand Canyon. Now I mentioned that Flagstaff was the closest stop, but that still meant an hour and a half drive. Anyway, we made it there and our tour guide walked us up, making sure we weren't looking and positioned us so that we had the best view possible. And here it is...


Stunning view... and the canyon isn't bad either


The only picture I have with all 7 of us. I managed to resist the temptation to push someone over the edge. And it was very tempting, just for the comedy value you understand


Don't look down. You can actually buy a book about everyone who's used the Grand canyon to commit suicide. Someone drove a car over the edge, didn't die, got out and jumped and still didn't die. Think they died in the end though


You can never capture the full size of the canyon in a picture but you still get a great sense of it's scale


Look at that heroic pose. You know, if something were to happen to Harrison Ford then I think we've found our new Indiana Jones. Note to self, serioulsy injure Harrsion Ford


Almost as impressive as Andy Bull without his shirt on. Although not quite as big. You know I'm only joking Andy, partially anyway


That looks dangerous, maybe I should get a job as a stunt man


See that point at the edge. That's where I was standing in the previous picture. I know, I'm a brave man


Darkness and light, a picture to represent the internal struggle of humanity with it's desire to eradicate itself. Powerful, thought provoking and artistically beautiful. As all photographs should be


Who put that tree there, it's spoilt my picture


A good thing about going with a tour guide was being taken to different parts of the canyon. We even got to walk down a little way. It's quite big though


Each place we went to was equally as stunning. The canyon never takes a bad picture. A bit like...


Yep, all that walking and being in the sun tired us out. Either that or a sacrifice was about to take place


This section was just past a Navahoe row of stalls. We tried to throw rocks into the river but couldn't make it. It's a lot further than it looks


The sun sets on another stop. It was on the train again at 5am the next morning to go to Kansas City. That was the plan anyway, did it happen? You'll have to keep checking back. Or you can send me money, whichever one suits you best

I've got a great idea for a movie

Hollywood, da da da da da da da Hollywood

Yes the third stop on the trip saw us arrive in the city of angels, Los Angeles. The only place on the trip I'd been to before. There was still plenty of new things to see though, but no, everywhere I went on this second trip I'd also done the previous time. Hollywood Boulevard, Universal Studios, Venice Beach, I even ate dinner and breakfast at two places I went to last time. Still it was great fun, extremely hot and it was our last chance to finally become the movie stars we deserve to be. Well, the others don't really deserve it as much as me, they're more like extras... character actors, you know if they wear a mask they'll look all right.

Anyway, after a night in the hostel bar we set off the next day to Universal Studios (not Six Flags) for a day of excitement, adventure, dry tacos and greasy burgers.


Uniersal Studios have produced many successful movies in their history. Not "Crank" though, how did they let that one slip through their fingers... Fools


No, Andy, you can't buy another guitar


Behind all the trees down there is Warner Brothers Studios. I went there on my last trip but not this time. They also didn't produce "Crank"


While at Universal we went on a tour around some of the outdoor sets that they have standing and built to help recreate any place from any era.


This ones for all you Desperate Housewives fans out there. Yes, we took a trip along Wysteria Lane and saw all their houses. Lets see if you can figure out whose this one is. I haven't got a clue


We also saw a lot of movie cars. Here's the Delorian from Back to the Future


And you may recognize this set from War of the Worlds starring the Cruiser. This also looked like most of our hostel rooms 5 minutes after we'd got in there and started to unpack



As good as Peter Jackson's King Kong film was, it failed to answer some serious questions. Why is Kong a King? Where is he King of? Who made him King? Does he have any actual power or is he just a figurehead? In the event that there is no heir, who will the crown pass to? 3 hours long and not one of these issues was dealt with. Poor film making


The Waterworld performance was just the same as last time I saw it, which wasn't a bad thing as it was quite enjoyable. The only new things they had was the Shrek 4-D experience and the Mummy Returns indoor rollercoaster. That began slowly like one of those really bad ghost train rides. Cheesy skeleton hands would hang from the ceiling, not much was happening and then suddenly you accelerate at an incredible velocity, reach the end and then do it again backwards. Also notable for Ian's facial expression on the picture. Which was also the same for the Jurassic Park ride where he got soaked


Virgin Megastores on Hollywood Boulevard. We didn't want to go in but Liz made us, she tried to ruin our trip by making us spend all our time in Virgin Megastores


The Mann's Chinese Theatre the next day. You'd get podgy, worthless, can't get a job, so called actors hanging around outisde dressed as Superman or Batman. They would then get annoyed if people took their picture without giving a tip. Get a proper job then losers. That's probably being a bit harsh actually. I apologise


Ian's foot desecrating William Shatner's star on the walk of fame. Poooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooopppppppppeeeeeee


The latest home of the Oscars. One day I will be here to pick up my little golden statue, you may not believe me but I will, oh yes


The Hollywood sign in days of yore


The Church of Scientology. Keenie went here and did a Scientology test. He claimed he didn't join but suspicions arose when he claimed "Battlefield Earth"to be the greatest movie ever made


On our final afternoon we set off on a long bus journey to Venice beach, home of Baywatch and more importantly the Hoff. Would we see him trying to hang onto past glories?


Liz checking up on me. You could never be too careful when I was around


My skills at photography clearly outmatch anyone else. Just look at this picture, marvellous


Simon and Gav looking pleased at their beach artwork


Ian and Andy running from the sea. It was the first time they'd ever seen it


Beautiful blue skies, palm trees, I'm feeling calm again


A view of the beach from the top of the Ferris Wheel. It looks so empty. Must have been all that toxic tar on the sand


Speaking of toxic tar, Simon got a little bit on his foot. Just a small dab here and there, but in Simon's mind I think he saw it more like this...


Oh no, how I'm gonna get this off


There was then a huge rush to make it to the train on time. You see the trains that we caught only ran once a day so we would have been pretty screwed if we missed it. We made it with 10 minutes to spare, but we cut it close. We were then off to Flagstaff and the Grand Canyon.

You don't want to make me angry, you wouldn't like it when I get angry.